Rudders and other things we think we need --

There's a wonderful musical named Two By Two concerning Noah and the Ark.  Danny Kay played Noah and didi a brilliant job,

At one point Noah and his sons get into an arguement about putting a rudder on the ark.  It's a fantastic song.  However at one point Noah has had enough and declares, "God has chosen us to survive, he promised, so why do we need a rudder?"  To which one son replies, "I don't know Papa. why do we need a boat?"

Two questions.
Why do we need a rudder?
Why do we need a boat?

Such a powerful picture of our walk along His Way.  He calls us to build a boat and we decide we need to improve upon it.  Not only do we want to improve what He has ordained but we want to add something that will give us some control.  There-in lies the rub.

Let go and let God?  Hardly!  Oh, we'll let God but most of us will not let go.  We won;t let go of our desire for - well - a rudder.  We hang on to "control" even though we have to know it's a mere illusion.  That is, if God is really sovereign.

We need a boat - that is the Redeemer.  But we want a rudder so we can -- wait for it -- so we can control the boat.  To abuse an old hymn:

Take my life and let it be

powered by you and run by me.

or

All to Jesus I surrender

all to Him I freely give

as long as I can control

the way in which I live.

Living "RADICALLY" for Jesus is all the rage.  Surrender everything, go to the booneys, give it all away - that's authentic Christianity.  Well pal, tell that to Lazarus and Nicodemus and the wealthy women who supported Jesus and the apostles.

Even this "living radically" is a rudder.  We're going to "do" for Him whether He has called us to "do" it or not.  We are in control, we man the helm.  We move the rudder.

God's call to service is similar yet singular.  Many do what I do in ministry but no one does it like "me."  Oh, we do some basic things that are similar - some even identical but God calls us individually and uses us individually.

BUT

This is not some call to individualism - it is a call to fight the fight to submit to Him and His will individually.  In His wondrous wisdom however He called us into a body - there are many of us.  He called us individually to become one with Him and one with each other.  NOT to become Him or each other. 

We are all in the same boat, a rudderless boat.  This boat is driven by the Spirit.  Rudderless we are at the mercy of the Holy Spirit which blows us here an there at the Father's will.  He steers the boat.  Unfortunately we want control so badly we fight Him and of course we lose.

ll

Getting a Grip When it all hurts Part 1 040114

Getting a Grip  When it all hurts Part 1  040114

1 Peter 5:6-11 ESV
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, [7] casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. [8] Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. [9] Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. [10] And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. [11] To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.

Wonderful words of encouragement and admonition.  But what do you do with it when it all hurts, when there is no sense of hope although you know there is a reason to?  What do you do when you read this and walk away empty and hollow?

First you realize that Satan will do all he can to create that hollowness and deepen it.  Whether through the world or the flesh he will use every means he can to deepen your despair.  We're not cut out to fight him ourselves but we must call upon - cry out for God to save us from this sense of hopeless sinking.  We must let God fight that battle for us and that is not easy.

Satan will do everything in his power to cast you down and to crush you.  One of his ploys is to isolate you from the Body.  We all know that in times of trouble people seem to withdraw, run, move away not wanting to be too close to the one in distress.  Now we can't blame them and we also know that we withdraw as well.  We, for whatever reason (shame, embarrassment even fear) want to hide away and curl up in a ball and disappear.

Satan wants us to be isolated - he doesn't hunt the herd but rather the solitary and wounded.  So when you are wounded and in despair it is making the situation worse if you curl in a ball in a corner.

Satan also wants to chase us into greater distress.  That's why he is roaring.  He wants us to run from him to where the rest of the pride is.  The pride is in the deep grass waiting for us to run into the middle of them so they may take us down.  We must not run.  We must slowly move in a safe direction and the only one who can show us that safe direction is God.

Satan also wants to get us to murmur - to complain about God as the Israelites did in the wilderness.  He wants us to complain about God and His treatment of us.  He wants us to deny God's goodness, His lovingkindness, His whole character.  He wants us to accuse God of wrong doing, of meanness, of hard heartedness or the typical - He's not fair.

All this and more Satan desires to do.  It is very very hard to stand in the face of a roaring lion but by the grace and power of God, we must.  Like Daniel we must stand among the hungry beasts and trust in God.  We must by the grace and mercy of God resist running - resist isolation - resist shame - resist murmuring.

None of us are the only believers who suffer.  Some suffer more and some less but suffering is suffering and when we are suffering ours is the only one we feel.  But Peter seems to indicate that knowing that we are not the only ones who suffer will be of benefit to us.  That's a hard thing but a true thing.  God is at work in the lives of countless believers and we should praise Him for that fact.  The starving, the oppressed, the persecuted are all trusting Him for so much more than the rest of us and they are holding fast - they've got a grip - faith.

Faith - faith that He can relieve us of our suffering.  Faith that it is meant for His glory.  Faith that it is meant for our good.  Faith that even if it kills us, as it does many, we will then be with Him, at peace and forever without suffering.

Heaven is not a consolation prize for those whose suffering kills them.  Heaven is the glorious reward that awaits those who are His and barring His coming prior to, death is the ony way to heaven.

I'll write more on this passage as I am able - but have faith my friends God is with you and for you - He wants to display His glory through, in and by your circumstances.  It is hard - at times is seems hopeless but I have to ask myself:  For what am I really hoping, treasuer here or treasure there?  The comfort of the world or the comfort of His grace.  It is a real battle - get a grip on His truth and providence and do not let go.

Be Not ..... But Be

052922

 Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? Or what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said, "I WILL DWELL IN THEM AND WALK AMONG THEM; AND I WILL BE THEIR GOD, AND THEY SHALL BE MY PEOPLE. "Therefore, COME OUT FROM THEIR MIDST AND BE SEPARATE," says the Lord. "AND DO NOT TOUCH WHAT IS UNCLEAN; And I will welcome you. "And I will be a father to you, And you shall be sons and daughters to Me," Says the Lord Almighty.  (2Co 6:14-18 NASB)

Not just wise words but an imperative that Paul gives here.  We cannot be “bound together” with unbelievers.  The literal meaning here is to not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.  That is to keep a respectful distance from them – to not see them as “brothers” or even ”cousins.”  We have to be very careful of our associations.

One reason is that we want to maintain the Christian distinctive.  They are not us – not even close and we must make that gently clear.  We can be friendly with them but we cannot be friends with them.

This is tough, especially when they are kind and friendly people.  But we have to keep a respectful distance in our relationship for they are of the devil no matter how “nice” they are.

They are, to put this boldly, both the harvest field and the enemy at the same time.  They do not want what is best for you nor even what is good for you.  They want what is good for them.  They are idolaters worshipping another God who stands in opposition to our God, the God.

Other verses that go with this one are:

I wrote you in my letter not to associate with immoral people; I did not at all mean with the immoral people of this world, or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters, for then you would have to go out of the world.  (1Co 5:9-10 NASB)

But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler—not even to eat with such a one. For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within the church? But those who are outside, God judges. REMOVE THE WICKED MAN FROM AMONG YOURSELVES.  (1Co 5:11-13 NASB)

Tough verses!!!!!!!!

How do we do this?  Carefully!

This does not mean that we do not admonish and counsel the erring brother but that we do not relate to them in a manner that even seems to condone their error.  Of course, we must seek to correct the erring brother, but all the while making it plain that we are out of fellowship with them.

Do not be deceived: "Bad company corrupts good morals."  (1Co 15:33 NASB) 

We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone.  (1Th 5:14 NASB) 

It is clear that we have to make and live out tough choices and it can be very frustrating and painful – but

Finally then, brethren, we request and exhort you in the Lord Jesus, that as you received from us instruction as to how you ought to walk and please God (just as you actually do walk), that you excel still more.  (1Th 4:1 NASB)

These scriptures should guide both our feelings and our actions toward others.  We must maintain the Christian distinctive while, at the same time, being kind and gentle, looking for and taking the opportunity to evangelize the unbeliever or admonish the so called brother.

NOTE that these brothers are called a “so-called” brothers – He or she is not a legitimate believer and that must be kept in mind – they are not of the faith – not related to us in Christ and they bring shame and disrepute to the Gospel.  Have little to do with them as possible and seek to win them to Christ – pray for them and the opportunity to witness/testify to them, remembering we just deliver the mail we can’t make them read it.

Remember;

How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, Nor stand in the path of sinners, Nor sit in the seat of scoffers! But his delight is in the law of the LORD, And in His law he meditates day and night. He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water, Which yields its fruit in its season And its leaf does not wither; And in whatever he does, he prospers. The wicked are not so, But they are like chaff which the wind drives away. Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, Nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous. For the LORD knows the way of the righteous, But the way of the wicked will perish.  (Psa 1:1-6 NASB)

We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone.   (1Th 5:14 NASB)

preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort, with great patience and instruction.  (2Ti 4:2 NASB)--

"Tetelesthai!" - but I am not -

Michael Sanders

336-549-2081

Moment by Moment 061216

Minutely by minute.

In depression, tomorrow makes a hell of today.  It's not the moment we're in that creates all the anxiety and pain but the moment that has not yet come.  Our affliction convinces us that the other shoe is dropping and will hit with devastating consequences.  So along with the with the afflicton of the depression itself we suffer that anticipatory anxiety that reeks havoc on our day.

This is especially hard for those of us who are believers.  We do indeed trust God but that trust is sullied by the afflictive anxiety.  What we KNOW battles against what we are able to feel.  There is no sense of confidence or hope or joy.  Though we know we have every good reason to experience those things, they are just not there for us.  That makes even the most outstanding blessing less than it ought to be.

God is meeting our needs and we know from the evidence  our past that He is a need meeting God and yet we can't bridge the distance from our heads to our hearts.  It is just too wide a gulf.  We can not get it done at least not oN our own.

The Holy Spirit, our designated comforter, is the only means and recourse we have to this menacing melancholy.  He is our only hope for experiencing the hope and the joy we are promised.  But we have got to call upon Him for it.  It has not been my experience that He will just infuse me with hope and joy out of the blue (although He can and might).  I have found that it takes disciplined prayer and a laser like focus on my need and His ability and willingness to provide.  It's not that I have to perform in a certain way for Him to act but that I have to work hard to silence the melancholy and anxious thoughts so that I am receptive to His provision.  Otherwise it's just a chaotic battle between my broken heart and mind and the truth.

This is why such disciplined prayer needs to be a regular part of our daily practice.  We need those moments of the Holy Spirit's ministry every day.  They are precious hard won moments.  YES we can pray that God will deliver us from this affliction and He well may do so, but, He may not.  It may be for our benefit or the benefit of others that we live and struggle with this affliction.  We all love to read about Job but none of us want to be him.

In this fallen world and in God's plan, this melancholy and anxious affliction is just one way through which He demonstrates His power, lovingkindness and provision.  We need to be responsible IN our affliction and work hard to make use of all the resources He provides so that His name will be glorified.  It is not easy nor is it pleasant, but as we say, "It is what it is."  If Paul can accept and be content with his thorn in the flesh, we can learn to emmulate him in our affliction.

Be oh so wary of those who can not accept and respect your affliction.  They may be well meaning but they are more often cruel in their attempts to "help" us.  Depression and anxiety say a lot about this fallen world and its effects on people, even His people.  A disciplined and focused prrayerful practice aimed at our affliction is the only answer that I have found that relieves the oppresson and dispells the shadows.

It's a lifetime battle but not one that has to defeat us.  We are more than conquerors, one battle at a time.

No more of this!

"No more of this!"  Jesus

Recorded in all four Gospels, there is just something about this incident that fascinates me.  What I am writing is not history but rather it is about a moment in history that, I believe, is more important than we think.  But for the providence of God, everything could have gone south in these moments..

Really read these passages:

Matthew 26:47-54 ESV
While he was still speaking, Judas came, one of the twelve, and with him a great crowd with swords and clubs, from the chief priests and the elders of the people. [48] Now the betrayer had given them a sign, saying, "The one I will kiss is the man; seize him." [49] And he came up to Jesus at once and said, "Greetings, Rabbi!" And he kissed him. [50] Jesus said to him, "Friend, do what you came to do." Then they came up and laid hands on Jesus and seized him. [51] And behold, one of those who were with Jesus stretched out his hand and drew his sword and struck the servant of the high priest and cut off his ear. [52] Then Jesus said to him, "Put your sword back into its place. For all who take the sword will perish by the sword. [53] Do you think that I cannot appeal to my Father, and he will at once send me more than twelve legions of angels? [54] But how then should the Scriptures be fulfilled, that it must be so?"

Mark 14:43-45, 47-50 ESV
And immediately, while he was still speaking, Judas came, one of the twelve, and with him a crowd with swords and clubs, from the chief priests and the scribes and the elders. [44] Now the betrayer had given them a sign, saying, "The one I will kiss is the man. Seize him and lead him away under guard." [45] And when he came, he went up to him at once and said, "Rabbi!" And he kissed him. [47] But one of those who stood by drew his sword and struck the servant of the high priest and cut off his ear. [48] And Jesus said to them, "Have you come out as against a robber, with swords and clubs to capture me? [49] Day after day I was with you in the temple teaching, and you did not seize me. But let the Scriptures be fulfilled." [50] And they all left him and fled.

Luke 22:47-53 ESV
While he was still speaking, there came a crowd, and the man called Judas, one of the twelve, was leading them. He drew near to Jesus to kiss him, [48] but Jesus said to him, "Judas, would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?" [49] And when those who were around him saw what would follow, they said, "Lord, shall we strike with the sword?" [50] And one of them struck the servant of the high priest and cut off his right ear. [51] But Jesus said, "No more of this!" And he touched his ear and healed him. [52] Then Jesus said to the chief priests and officers of the temple and elders, who had come out against him, "Have you come out as against a robber, with swords and clubs? [53] When I was with you day after day in the temple, you did not lay hands on me. But this is your hour, and the power of darkness."

John 18:3-11 ESV
So Judas, having procured a band of soldiers and some officers from the chief priests and the Pharisees, went there with lanterns and torches and weapons. [4] Then Jesus, knowing all that would happen to him, came forward and said to them, "Whom do you seek?" [5] They answered him, "Jesus of Nazareth." Jesus said to them, "I am he." Judas, who betrayed him, was standing with them. [6] When Jesus said to them, "I am he," they drew back and fell to the ground. [7] So he asked them again, "Whom do you seek?" And they said, "Jesus of Nazareth." [8] Jesus answered, "I told you that I am he. So, if you seek me, let these men go." [9] This was to fulfill the word that he had spoken: "Of those whom you gave me I have lost not one." [10] Then Simon Peter, having a sword, drew it and struck the high priest's servant and cut off his right ear. (The servant's name was Malchus.) [11] So Jesus said to Peter, "Put your sword into its sheath; shall I not drink the cup that the Father has given me?"
_________________________________________________________________________________________

Do you see "this"?  Is "this" clearer to you now?  Do you think you could see "IT" in your day to day life - the commonality of your Christianity.  Or do you just ignore "this" and and float through your day doing what you think appropriate?

Oh - what is "this?"  "This," is relying upon your understanding and ability to address life in all it's wonder and woundings.

"This," is, though having many opportunities to grow in your knowledge and understanding, being content to remain in ignorance and to operate by what you "feel" or "think" and not upon the truth which is available for the taking.

"This" is that bad habit we have ot thinking God needs our help with anything.
"This" is engaging "our" solution and not waiting upon the Lord to lead.
"This" is fighting a spiritual battle with fleshly weapons.
"This" is trying to "make up for" one error with a worse one (or one at all).
"This" is wacking off an ear trying to instigate a confrontation so, "things can come to a head."  (Attacking the "faith" those who oppose our faith.)

"This" is pride, hubris, vanity, ignorance, impetuosity, impulsivelness, arrogance, shallowness . . . .

"This," is sin.

We are learning . . . .

Old thoughts and reflections worth remembering!

Written during our wilderness time in Texas

Just thinking about being out here in Texas and not knowing why.  Oh, we thought we had a reason but the sinfullness and duplicity of man put a quick end to that.  So we're out here, away from family and friends, with no idea what God has planned.  But I read too much to be without faith that He is in charge and will indeed work this thing out for our good and His glory.

But I would warn you, when you sense God's leading, take a nap.  Give it a break.  Don't charge forward.  We really ought to have prayed more, gotten more council and really investigated what we were getting into.  Had we done that we might well have chosen to live in our car in Greensboro rather than make the move.

But there is some up sides to this situation.  We have far less, though still too much, junk than we did.  We got to experience the kindness, care and support of family and friends as we prepared to move.  We really know we are loved.  We experience God's providence moment by moment.  We are learning about the sinfulness of our hearts and what He wants us to work on.  We get to miss people which is hard but wonderful.  We get to remember all the blessings of the past and look toward those of the future.  We get to find out new things about each other and our marriage.  We get to trust Him better each day.  We get to be convicted and to repent.  We get to discover new and awesome things about living for Him.

Being here is kind of a left-handed blessing.  The bitter with the sweet.  The good and the bad without the ugly.  Daily we confront small crisis and get to see Him resolve them.  Moment by moment we get to experience His comfort in our anxiety.  Night by night we get to sleep (that's day by day since I work nights.).  We get to enjoy learning to pray more deeply and more wisely.  We get to wait and rest.

Oh, I could complain, and do, but I feel foolish when I look at the sum total of our lives here.

All we thought would be a blessing once we got here went south on us.  It has been and is painful so we're learning to deal with anger and bitterness.  We're also learning to deal with pride, learning to see it from new and different directions.  We are learning to not murmur.  We are learning to trust Him way more than we trust others.  We are learning not to assume, suppose and accept on face value.  We are learning to not settle for anything but His best.  We are learning to pray openly and honestly laying our wants at His feet and holding out for them unless we are shown they are off base.  We are learning that we can not do it on our own.  We are learning that sometimes you just have to push forward.

Oh, I could complain, and do but then I just feel silly and foolish.

We are learning that the best cure for anxiety and worry is serving others.  We are learning that depression does not always win and that you can do more than you think even when the depression is at its worse.  We are learning that panic attacks always fail.  We are learning that we are weak and frail by design. We are learning a lot!

We are learning that you can feel sorry for yourself when appropriate but that it passes as you lean on Him.  We are learning that sadness is not a bad thing as long as it is not over much.  We are learning  that tears are often very appropriate.  We are learning that the disciplines of the faith are crucial.  We are learning that living the life takes practice, consistent practice.  We are learning that orthopraxy is only good with orthodoxy (lol).

We are learning that a little crazy is a good thing.  We are learning to be discriminating in our activities and pleasures.  We are learning that we can be too inundated by the world (this election stuff).  We're learning that what goes in the ear can really mess with the head...not to mention what goes in the eyes.  We are learning that Ruko is a blessing.  We are learning to love radio.

Philippians 4:8 ESV
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Thoughts on Self-examination

Put yourselves to the test and judge yourselves, to find out whether you are living in faith. Surely you know that Christ Jesus is in you?—unless you have completely failed.

(2Co 13:5)

We are (hopefully) aware of our sins.  But I have discovered that I tend to focus on a few sins that are consistently troubling me and missing others.  That's the beauty and facility of self-examination.  It is a dedicated, focused, intentional thing and not some cursory activity.

I have not trouble seeing my pride and idolatry or even lust for that matter - they are glaringly obvious.  But I miss or avoid many others.

An example is found in Matthew 12:36-37:

"You can be sure that on the Judgment Day you will have to give account of every useless word you have ever spoken. Your words will be used to judge you—to declare you either innocent or guilty."

(Mat 12:36-37) GNB

"But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment. "For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned."

(Mat 12:36-37) NASB

The word translated "useless" or "careless it the Greek word ̓argos meaning free from labor, at leisure

or  lazy, shunning the labor which one ought to perform.

The implied imperative is that we should actually "labor" before we speak.  I tend to yell at clumsy drivers when I am in the car.  My wife cringes when I do this.  It's careless/useless, sinful.  I give no thought to what's in my mind and heart I just let fly.  This is not good.

What about OMG (Oh my God).  There's a show on TV called Clean House where a team goes into a badly cluttered home and straightens it out.  Then they "reveal" what they have done to the owners who have been away at a hotel.  Almost to a person when the finished work is revealed they say OMG, never thinking about what they're saying.

We all have little saying we use to express pleasure or disdain and these need to be examined for, well, holiness, usefulness, carefulness.

But careless speech is just one of the "sins" we rarely think about.  Our thought life is an area where we are remiss - we fail to:

We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ,  (2Co 10:5)

I know that this used of this verse is a stretch but I think the principle is sound in the instance.  We need to think about our thinking.

And what about our feelings.  they can get pretty nasty as well but we have thm and we rarely take the time to examine them or their source - Why do I feel _____?

Self examination is a critical component of our /Christina walk and we need to take it seriously.  I am read the journals of David Brainerd an missionary in the 1800 and am convicted by his sensitivity to his sinfulness.  Of course he was of a melancholy disposition and that played a part but he really "discovered" his vileness in the light of Christ.  If it's OK to envy good things, I envy him.

We need to take the time and really examine our Walk.

What about our use of what God has given us?  Do we use it for our pleasure and gratification (or measuring up to others) or do we use it to bless the Church and the needy.  Is your 10% the best you can do - maybe for you it is but for most of us we could do a lot better.

In my years as a Leadership consultant the most difficult thing I had to teach people was how to say "No," when "NO," was the right answer.  How about saying no to ourselves.  We see it  we want is was expend recourses to get it.  We don't say "No," to ourselves - hence we sin when we squander God's provision.

Jesus was very clear;  "Do not store up riches for yourselves here on earth, where moths and rust destroy, and robbers break in and steal. Instead, store up riches for yourselves in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and robbers cannot break in and steal. For your heart will always be where your riches are.  (Mat 6:19-21)

Self-examination has to be broader and wider and deeper than we usually do it.  It takes time and effort but how can one repent of a sin that one is only vaguely aware of it=f at all

But then. some of us don't want to examine ourselves.  To do so would lead to conclusions we are not comfortable with.  

Better than "Yes!"

 1 John 5:14-15 ESV

And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. [15] And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him.

See, that's the kicker, discerning if my request is according to His will.

A lot of things seem "good" and "fair" and "just" and they well may be but that does not mean, at least in my experience, that they are according to His will.  They may be outside His will or even contrary to His will.  It depends on the circumstances and, well, His will.

Ephesians 5:10 ESV
and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord.

1 Thessalonians 5:14-15, 17-18 ESV
And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. [15] See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone. [17] pray without ceasing, [18] give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

We always pray, "Your will be done." But all too often, for me at least, it's my way of confessing that I am absolutely clueless as to whether or not my request is in His will.

Then there is the kicker:

James 4:3 ESV
You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.

There's the.  I assume that many of my personal prayers are not answered in the way I hope because somewhere underneath all the solumn prayer words there lurks some selfish motive that thwarts, not His answer, but my asking.  I ask wrongly.

That's a tough nut to crack!  I can well understand why the Puritains were so determined concerning the need for self-examination.   We really do have to accept that our hearts are deceitful and that we are the ones we deceive most  often.  We can easily fool ourselves into thinking that we are being selfless and submissive in our prayer and that they are according to His will.

Right now I have a very specific prayer request before Him.  I've kept it simple, short and sweet.  I don't believe is it greedy or self-serving but rather fair, good and reasonable.  BUT there is a lurking doubt in the back of my mind because I will benefit from a "Yes  It is a prayer about me, for me.  It is a prayer and also a test.  I have asked for X which is a fair request and consider a "Yes" as an answer to another request/query.  In short I have figured if He grants X then Y is in His will.  Make sense?

But then that old....ask wrongly and don't test God thing comes up in my mind and I doubt not His goodness but the rightness of my prayer.

So I come to:

Philippians 4:5-7 ESV
Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; [6] do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. [7] And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

This does not promise a "Yes," to my prayer.  What it does promise is His peace in His answer which will in turn guard my heart and my mind.  And isn't that better than a "Yes"?

On Fear

Prayer is the best outlet to fear: where is the Christian that cannot set his seal to this direction?   Flavel, John (2010-08-03). Keeping the Heart (Kindle Locations 669-670).   Kindle Edition.   

Psa 118:5  Out of my distress I called on the LORD; the LORD answered me and set me free.  ESV

In times of danger  no matter its magnitude  fear is natural.  Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the acting upon it.  What greater thing could we do than to go to our Father with all our fears.

Isn't Christ, our intercessor and Great High Priest, seated with the Father speaking of us and for us?  Does not Christ appreciate and understand our weaknesses and vulnerabilities?

If, as we see in the quote above, Satan knows and exploits our fears, does not our Father know more and better?  In all things fearful is it not enough that nothing can separate us from the love of God?  Surely upon that assurance we can stand.

But we are weak as babes in our walk with Christ  as we should be.      Though we lived in the wiles of the Devil and the fantasies of the flesh, we do not know living in the security and power of our Lord.  So we tremble and quake as Satan and our budding/immature faith both work to our distress.

Trusting God is not something that just comes.  It is gained by experience, informed by His Word and enhanced by His Spirit.  I have trusted God in many situations and yet every new situation raises the hair on the back of my neck.

I wonder, God was faithful there and then but this is here and now.  Even though I know that when it was then and there for me, He was already readying here and now for me.  But I still fear.

 
I've noticed something, though, about that fear.  It is characterized by the question, What am I (or we) going to do”?  Perhaps that's where we get tripped up.  We face a circumstance and supposing we must or can do something, we start with ourselves.  Seeing no help for or in ourselves, we fear.  Because we are already afraid we think we don't have faith.  Because we think we don't have faith we doubt God will help us.

Perhaps were starting at the wrong place.  Perhaps we need to take the circumstance (and our fear) to Him immediately and ask Him what we need to do (if anything).  Perhaps we need to slow down, examine the circumstance and take our thoughts and concerns to Him and have a talk. 

 
I wonder if at times I irritate Him (LOL).  I try to take circumstances to Him and leave them with Him but it doesn't work very well.  I've found that I need to stay before Him and take the time to pour out my ideas and thoughts concerning the circumstance.  If I don't, I find myself fretting and distracted.  So I try to go to Him and just babble out my ideas, my tangential concerns, my solutions, my fears.  It seems that this process has a quieting effect on my soul.

But just recently, I've discovered that I rise from prayer too swiftly.  I'll pray and then get into bed and I'll just go on trying to fix the problem in my head.  I think that, at those times, I need to get back on my knees and continue the conversation  obviously, I wasn't done (or maybe He wasn't). 

 
Ok  for those of you who are thinking, Do I have to be on my knees,  Ill just tell you that I do.  As I've intentionally worked on my prayer life, I've discovered that it just feels more like prayer when I'm kneeling.  Do I have to?  I don't think I have to for Him  but I do for me.  That's just me  and we all know I'm just not right. 

 
Prayer is worship  but it is conversational worship.  I speak, He listens.  How He responds is unclear to me  I haven't heard voices yet.  But I trust Him to respond because He always has.  Either through the Word, a change of circumstance, another believer, a random sermon I hear, a random book I read, or even a random thought, He answers.  Oh, I know none of those things are really random.  They are intentional and purposeful  so maybe utterly unexpected is a better term.  But the point is, He answers.

Concerning the verse I used above.  Notice that the writer says that God set him free.  The term distress has the sense of tightness, like when your chest gets tight when you are anxious.  Now the writer doesnt say what his freedom looked like.  Was the circumstance changed or was his anxiety relieved?  But would we complain of either?  I hope not.

Dont let yourself think that you should only do this for the big stuff.  Make it a habit to do it with everything.  Pour, it all out to God.  What seems trivial today may loom large tomorrow, so you may as well get a head start on it. 

Back with a vengance

Job 17:11 NASBS
"My days are past, my plans are torn apart, Even the wishes of my heart.

So there ya go, life (right now) in West Texas.  We're lower than a gators belly on a mud flat....and that's looowwww.  But down ain't out and we're still breathling.  But........West Texas???????  Ouch.

Tough times back home were tough but at least we were surrounded by friends and family.

Did we miss-read God's leading in coming out here?

Well...... 

Proverbs 16:9 NASBS
The mind of man plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps.

Now toss in......

Proverbs 21:5 NASBS
The plans of the diligent lead surely to advantage, But everyone who is hasty comes surely to poverty.

Now we're really concerned!

BUT

Proverbs 16:3 NASBS
Commit your works to the LORD And your plans will be established.

And

Proverbs 15:22 NASBS
Without consultation, plans are frustrated, But with many counselors they succeed.

So we commit and wait upon Him and what counsel He will bring us from those whom He leads to do you ---- yeah, that's you all.

Bless you all

"Lend" to the poor.

Deuteronomy 15:7-11 ESV
"If among you, one of your brothers should become poor, in any of your towns within your land that the LORD your God is giving you, you shall not harden your heart or shut your hand against your poor brother, [8] but you shall open your hand to him and lend him sufficient for his need, whatever it may be. [9] Take care lest there be an unworthy thought in your heart and you say, 'The seventh year, the year of release is near,' and your eye look grudgingly on your poor brother, and you give him nothing, and he cry to the LORD against you, and you be guilty of sin. [10] You shall give to him freely, and your heart shall not be grudging when you give to him, because for this the LORD your God will bless you in all your work and in all that you undertake. [11] For there will never cease to be poor in the land. Therefore I command you, 'You shall open wide your hand to your brother, to the needy and to the poor, in your land.'

Enough said.  Not enough follow-through

Having been in very real need, I have been blessed by brothers and sisters who heard God's directive and have engaged and followed through.  It was tough to ask and tough to receive but a blessing nonetheless.

"Poor" is a tough place to be.

Notice that this passage does not qualify poverty.  It does not discuss the "why" behind the poverty it simply says that if one of our vrothers becomes poor we are to see that they are provided with sufficient to meet their need.  It says we are to "lend" them  whatever is sufficient for that need.

"Lend ?"   Lend a poor person money?  Yep, that's what is says (and remember the law against charging interest).  It's tough to think of lending a poor person money.  It's easier to just give it to them, and that'66s ok too but when you lend it to them, you are invested in their growing out of poverty.  You have an interest in their overcoming whatever their negative circumstance is and going on to be lifted out of their poverty.  This is a good motivator for the giver to stay engaged in the life of the one in need.

Giving them what they need is a good thing but jt can be a kind of "fire and forget" blessing.  It's real easy to just give and walk away feelimg good about having given.  But, if we take the injunction to "lend" them what they need seriously we can't just walk away.  We take on some form of responsibility with them for the bettermemt of their condition.  That's charity plus!  That is the will of the Lord.  That is part of of the plan.

With many if not most of the "poor," something has occured in their lives to cast then into that condition.  It is God's will that they not remain in  that condition but that they rise from it.  That means that besides the poverty, the cause needs to be addressed.  Thatxs phase two of God's answer to the poor brother's need and one He thoroughly expects us to have a part in.  Whether we take direct and intimate action for their benefit or we help them aquire the connections and resources they need, we are not allowed to "fire and forget" our blessing to them.

The whole notion of lending to the poor is to keep us engaged in their progress.  Charity is tough to give and tough to take but to just drop a gift on them and drop out of their lives is just cruel.  It's saying, "Here's some stuff, lots of luck you are on your own."  Well, being on their own probably contributed to their becoming poor.  Leaving them to their own devices, even with a generous gift, is not going to help them the way they need help!

Having a lending mindset also creates a covenant between you and them. There are legitimate expectations that need to be made clear and carried out.  If one lends, one has the right to expect a return.  But a return is only possible when the one lended to is willing to be helped beyond the lending.  He that is lent to incures an obljgation beyond simple repayment.  They incure the obigation to work to address the cause not just the condition.  We undertake an obligation beyond just the giving.  A good rule of thumb for our role is found in:

1 Thessalonians 5:14 ESV
And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.

This directs us to a broad range of needs and a clear course of action.  One does not take responsibility "for" them but takes responsibility "with" them. We stay engaged and involved.

Galatians 6:2 ESV
Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Psalm 16:1-2

Psalm 16:1-2 ESV
Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge. [2] I say to the LORD, "You are my Lord; I have no good apart from you."

Boy is this one we do not pray;
Often enough
Loud enough
Humbly enough
Sincerely enough

You really can't expect verse 1 without verse 2

It's tough to hang on to the "no good" of verse 2
We really fight that
Or
Ignore that
Or
Conveniently forget it

It's not a comfortable truth
It pricks our flesh
It irritates the abiding sin in us
It pokes us in our pride
It's an "ouch"

But a failure to remember verse 2
Set us up for failure
Disappointment
Despair
Depression
Confusion
Consternation
Complications

We really don't get the power behind the word "Lord"
We forget that to call Him Lord
Is to surrender
Abdicate
Give it all up

We want to be preserved
Our way
Under our power
In ourtime
For our purposes
Admit it's true

But that gives lie to our calling Him Lord

It's tough
It's uncomfortable
It's even a little scary
But
It is imperative

Takes commitment
Focus
Faith
And remembering
Lots of remembering

Great prayer
But
It demands a lot more than we want to think about