Melancholy 020414 Help

Melacholy isolates.  Isolation is not good.
But it"s tough to be in groups when one is afflicted with melacholy.

Their funny isn't funny.
Their sadness is too much.
Their smiles are frightening.
Their happiness is sorrow.

Everything is twisted into a knot of pain and darkness.

But - isolation ins't good.

We need each other.

Just being with someone
Quietly
Tenderheartedly
Compassionately
Just being with someone can help

The temptation though is to try to "fix" the melancholy
Resist that

Encourage using tangible things
Simple things
Avoid the high and lofty.

Read then scripture
Gentle scripture
Tender scripture
Read softly
Lovingly

Once, when I was in a particularly tough time I found that emails, texts and even brief phone messages were powerful tools.  I was alone but not forgotten.  People were praying for me thinking of me even rooting for me.  It made a quiet simple difference.

He cares for us - let us let Him.

Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall. It is better to be of a lowly spirit with the poor than to divide the spoil with the proud. Whoever gives thought to the word will discover good, and blessed is he who trusts in the LORD.   (Pro 16:18-20)

Ok, I'm going to meddle - and expose!

Pride does indeed go before destruction.  But I've discovered two things.  First, "destruction" may come so that pride is exposed.  Pride must be exposed so we may repent of it.

Second, even in the "destruction" pride will fight tooth and nail.

We live in a culture of pride.  Pride of ownership, pride of place, pride of success.  We are encouraged to "have our pride" and to protect it regardless of the cost.  We are taught that humiliation and being humble are the same and both are bad.  

We recently received a couple of gifts to help us meet our obligations.  I can only describe me initial feeling as wonderful humiliation.  No sooner was I rejoicing at the kindness and generosity of my brothers and sisters in Christ than I was overcome with a deep and painful sense of shame and humiliation.

Pride makes us suffer, when we suffer, in isolation.  We are convinced that we need to "put a good face," on everything.  It's the old, "never let them see you sweat," admonition that sold tons of antiperspirant.  Huh?

Sweating is a normal and healthy bodily function.  We, however, have become convinced that it is not acceptable.  But, not sweating can be dangerous.

Suffering, difficult times, are normal for believers but we have become convinced that any suffering is a sign that we are somehow under God's wrath.  This is the cruelest deception our enemy perpetrates on us.  In Christ we have only God's discipline, never -- NEVER - His wrath.

Yet we react to suffering as though we should be ashamed.  Others react to our suffering as though we should be shunned.  This should not be - but it is - and we must work depending on Him to overcome it.

I am asking myself:   How do I face these people now that my need is known?  How can I hold my head up, look them in the eye?  What are they really thinking when they look at me?  What are they really saying when our situation comes up in conversation?

See the worm of pride in that?  See the self-focus?  See the suspicion of God's provision through His people?  Seer how the worm of pride eats away at the mercies and grace of God in our hearts?  See how pride is the great spoiler of blessings?

When God disciplines us with a "destruction" He does so because He loves us and He wants better for and of us than has been the case.  He wants us to depend upon Him more than we have.  This is a good thing even though it can be a painful thing.

In his sermon, 

109	February 29, 2012: Casting All Your Cares Alistair Begg | Messages from Truth For Life Truth For Life

Alistair addresses this issue.  I listen to this sermon every night as I go to bed.  I am working though the prideful anxiety he speaks about.  It's not easy and it is certainly not pleasant but I know it must be done.

Living in each 60 seconds casting my cares upon Him is tough.  I have learning and am still learning that it is not something I can do on my own.  I am also learning that I am not expected to do it on my own.  It is quite the opposite, I am to seek His provision, His power, to do it.  I won't do it on my own - not can I.

I want to encourage all of you who understand what I am writing about to accept not only His merciful discipline but also His gracious offer of care, comfort and provision.  


Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.  (1Pe 5:6-7)

This is the passage that Alistair preaches from.  Humbling and casting go together and we may have confidence in doing so because He cares for us.  

Father, let my focus on "I" be from my need for You and not because of my need.  You tell me to humble myself and to cast my anxiety on You.  I want to and I know that I must have Your provision to do so.  Please Father, keep this promise before my eyes and in my heart.  

Father, protect me from those pin-points of pride that steal my joy and confidence in you.  Make me understand that becoming humble is a good thing and what You are doing in our lives is a blessing and a mercy and that if flows from Your love and grace.

Father make it possible for me to know Your kindness and care and to accept You provision with a humble and contrite heart.  My anxiety does not come from You and I ask that You silence and still it.  Lord, take the sinful pride from my heart and make me move forward in Your love and grace and service.

Amen.

Psalm 6:6

I am weary with my sighing; Every night I make my bed swim, I dissolve my couch with my tears. (Psa 6:6)

Everyone who knows what this is like, stand up!

Now the Psalm goes on to express great confidence in God and His mercy and justice so we're not going to have a pity party.

But - this sighing and tears should not be uncommon in the life of the believer.  We should be sighing and shedding teasr not only for our sins and our needs but for all those who do not have the comfort of knowing God and being His.

Oh, the verse struck me because of our hard times right now but God was gracious enough to not allow me to get stuck on me.  I not only thought of all the redeemed who are suffering affliction and need but of the countless millions who live (or lived) in the utter darkness and hopelessness of being godless and rebellious.

Our problems seem as nothing compared to the problems the un-redeemed live with and will face.  Imagine being in whatever situation you find yourself in and NOT having a loving and caring Father.  Imagine believing that you're here and you die with no purpose or reason.  Worse still (for me at least) imagine living believing that you were at the mercy - the utter mercy of fate (or whatever capricious entity you want).

Oh, I still weep for us and our affliction and need but I weep for others now as well.  Why?  Well - Jesus did.  the shortest verse in the Bible reads:


Jesus wept.   (Joh 11:35)

He wept even though He knewHhe was about to resurrect Lazarus. Why did He weep?  Well, we'll probably have to ask Him later.  But, He loved and He loved not just as the Son of God, the Redeemer but He loved as Jesus the teacher from Galilee - the guy.

Perhaps the thing I am learning the most recently is about the humanity of my Lord.  The more I see it the more amazed and humbled and comforted I am.  His Lordship and Savior-hood are indeed amazing - but to think that He was like you and I and He would weep for a friend - and for many many others - makes it OK for me to weep.

But, as I said - I have had to broaden the subject of my tears in His honor, for His glory and because He did.

Father let me weep but let me not simply weep for myself and my loved ones!  Let me weep for the brothers and sisters who struggle with every thing from the common difficulties here to the catastrophic difficulties here.  When I weep for me, open the arms of my heart to take in Your body and the lost as well.  Let my heart break yet make my soul sing in Your grace for Your creation.
Amen

Psalm 139:2 He understands!!!!

You know when I sit down and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar. 

(Psa 139:2)

Think about it.  I know you know that God knows when we sit don and when we rise up.  But have you considered that He "understands" our thoughts?  That's not just our good thoughts or our thoughts about Him but He understands our less than acceptable thoughts as well.  He understands!!

Consider:

Therefore, He had to be made like His brethren in all things, so that He might become a merciful and faithful high priest in things pertaining to God, to make propitiation for the sins of the people. For since He Himself was tempted in that which He has suffered, He is able to come to the aid of those who are tempted.   (Heb 2:17-18)

He understands!!

I don't know how to express the depth and breadth of this.  It, for me, is overwhelming and kind of a scary comfort.  He understands!!

Consider - He was made like us- He was tempted Himself.  Yes, unlike us He did not sin but He "gets it."

Now, this can in no way be taken as some sort of an excuse for our way-ward and inappropriate thoughts - sin is still sin and error will always be error - but He understands!!

As Patti and I pass through this time of testing and trial we have "not so good thoughts."  Fearful thoughts, legalistic thoughts, hopeless thoughts, fleshly thoughts and murmuring thoughts.  They just come and when they do they distress us - greatly.  But I keep having some interesting thoughts as well.

I think, "Why me, why this,why now, why so heavy?"  Kind of like Moses I want to say, "Here I am Lord, send Aaron!"   Even, "Let this cup pass from me!"  But I am humbled when

I have the thought, "If not me, then who?"  I struggle to accept that this is His will for us right now.  Not to sound arrogant - but, He picked us for this and this for us for His glory and honor - not to mention our blessing.  This makes us no more "special" than any other believers - it just makes us the ones He is using where we are, in this circumstance.

With no Egypt there would have been no Exodus.  Without a crucifixion there would have been no resurrection.  No, I'm not elevating myself or my situation but I am trying hard to see it within the context of God bringing glory to Himself and strengthening me.

What helps is, He understands my fearful and anxious thought,s and though I know He desires that I overcome them by trusting Him, He is sympathetic to my weakness and frailty (which is part of what He wants me to see and appreciate so I will lean on Him).

Please dear ones hold tight to the truth that He understands all our thoughts!  Yes, He disapproves of many and worries for us over others but none of them come as some cosmic shock to Him.  He knew we'd have them and has provided relief for and from them because He understands!

Father my heart and my mind are weak and rebellious.  Only You can temper and tame them.  Knowing that You understand and that You sympathize and provide is such a comfort.

But Father, do not let me grow lazy or complacent concerning them.  Let me take hold of them and bring them to You for Your ministry and mercy.  Be gentle with me Lord for I am much like a little rabbit - jumpy and anxious.  Care for me by giving me the heart of a child when it comes to You.  Give me stronger trust and firmer assurance as each day passes and my imaginings and fancies prove false though frightening.

Let me know more and more Your lovingkindness and Your understanding and open myself to Your instruction and care.  Make me remember Your past mercies and provision and be deaf to the lies and cries of the deceiver.  Let me look only to You and hear only You as You minister to me through Your Word, Your Spirit and Your people.

Thank You for letting me know - You understand!!

Amen