Getting a Grip When it all hurts Part 1 040114

Getting a Grip  When it all hurts Part 1  040114

1 Peter 5:6-11 ESV
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, [7] casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. [8] Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. [9] Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. [10] And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. [11] To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.

Wonderful words of encouragement and admonition.  But what do you do with it when it all hurts, when there is no sense of hope although you know there is a reason to?  What do you do when you read this and walk away empty and hollow?

First you realize that Satan will do all he can to create that hollowness and deepen it.  Whether through the world or the flesh he will use every means he can to deepen your despair.  We're not cut out to fight him ourselves but we must call upon - cry out for God to save us from this sense of hopeless sinking.  We must let God fight that battle for us and that is not easy.

Satan will do everything in his power to cast you down and to crush you.  One of his ploys is to isolate you from the Body.  We all know that in times of trouble people seem to withdraw, run, move away not wanting to be too close to the one in distress.  Now we can't blame them and we also know that we withdraw as well.  We, for whatever reason (shame, embarrassment even fear) want to hide away and curl up in a ball and disappear.

Satan wants us to be isolated - he doesn't hunt the herd but rather the solitary and wounded.  So when you are wounded and in despair it is making the situation worse if you curl in a ball in a corner.

Satan also wants to chase us into greater distress.  That's why he is roaring.  He wants us to run from him to where the rest of the pride is.  The pride is in the deep grass waiting for us to run into the middle of them so they may take us down.  We must not run.  We must slowly move in a safe direction and the only one who can show us that safe direction is God.

Satan also wants to get us to murmur - to complain about God as the Israelites did in the wilderness.  He wants us to complain about God and His treatment of us.  He wants us to deny God's goodness, His lovingkindness, His whole character.  He wants us to accuse God of wrong doing, of meanness, of hard heartedness or the typical - He's not fair.

All this and more Satan desires to do.  It is very very hard to stand in the face of a roaring lion but by the grace and power of God, we must.  Like Daniel we must stand among the hungry beasts and trust in God.  We must by the grace and mercy of God resist running - resist isolation - resist shame - resist murmuring.

None of us are the only believers who suffer.  Some suffer more and some less but suffering is suffering and when we are suffering ours is the only one we feel.  But Peter seems to indicate that knowing that we are not the only ones who suffer will be of benefit to us.  That's a hard thing but a true thing.  God is at work in the lives of countless believers and we should praise Him for that fact.  The starving, the oppressed, the persecuted are all trusting Him for so much more than the rest of us and they are holding fast - they've got a grip - faith.

Faith - faith that He can relieve us of our suffering.  Faith that it is meant for His glory.  Faith that it is meant for our good.  Faith that even if it kills us, as it does many, we will then be with Him, at peace and forever without suffering.

Heaven is not a consolation prize for those whose suffering kills them.  Heaven is the glorious reward that awaits those who are His and barring His coming prior to, death is the ony way to heaven.

I'll write more on this passage as I am able - but have faith my friends God is with you and for you - He wants to display His glory through, in and by your circumstances.  It is hard - at times is seems hopeless but I have to ask myself:  For what am I really hoping, treasuer here or treasure there?  The comfort of the world or the comfort of His grace.  It is a real battle - get a grip on His truth and providence and do not let go.

Getting a Grip When it all hurts Part 2

Getting a Grip  When it all hurts Part 2

1 Peter 5:6-11 ESV
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, [7] casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. [8] Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. [9] Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. [10] And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. [11] To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.


And what are we to do when it all hurts?  Peter admonishes us to humble ourselves.  Well friends when you've feeling humiliation you can't risk confusing that with humbling.

Humiliation is quite simply of the world, the flesh and the devil.  Humiliation uses the world's standards to judge.  Humiliation springs from deep in the murky recesses of our not yet completely pure hearts.  Humiliation is an affliction from Satan fed by the world and enhanced by the flesh.  Humiliation is sin - insidious sin that Satan wants to inject into our lives to blind us to God's grace and mercy and to keep us from humbling ourselves under God's mighty hand.  Now - even that's a toughie.

Humbling ourselves - why did Peter have to say it that way?  Have you ever tried to humble yourself? It is not easy and lasts but a moment.  I find that when I kneel before God to humble myself all my flesh jumps to the front with all these great ideas about what I can to to relief the suffering.  If not that then my mind runs to all the ways God ought to fix the situation.  Humbling yourself is really really hard.

And yet, under Gods mighty hand, we are told to do just that. I don' t know about you but I think Peter knew well that humbling one's self was something one has to do over and over and over and over and ---well you get my point.

Humbling one's self is not some complex process - it's a hard one but not complex.  You simply (as a friend of mine told me) sit quietly and ask God to do the work.  As He works and the flesh rebels - stay calm - keep asking - repent of sins that aise in your mind - rebuke those self-driven thoughts - reject all those great ideas of yours.  My friend would simply go into the woods near his house, sit on a log and pray, "Lord, it's Travis," and then sit quietly waiting for his mind and heart to slow down and then he would begin to talk.

The, God's mighty hand, part of the passage gives me pause.  Does it mean that God is pressing me down with His hand or does it mean that His mighty hand is covering me, protecting me?   I would go with the latter although my flesh votes for the former.  In suffering it is hard to sense God's hand protecting you and easy to think that He is crushing you.  But does God really crush His people.  Even Job in all his sufferiing was not crushed and God's mighty hand was protecting him (see Job 1 and 2).  In all Job suffered God would allow Satan to only go so far and no further.

So it is, I believe, with us.  His mighty hand covers us -protecting us from anything that would crush and drive us from Him.

But we have to humble ourselves and I believe that means that we do what we can do and leave the rest to Him.  I've said many times, "When you have done all you can the rest is for God to do."  Of course we have to have a good definition of "all we can."

Now having said that I have to say that what we do - what we can do must be what he would have us do.  This quite simply demands three things of us.  First we must pray and I mean PRAY - It's not easy to pray when we are suffering but we have to - I've had to - fight through all the distractions to just pray.  But we must - well - demand that He do what only He can as we go about what we can do.  We need Him to both lead us and stop us.  We need to do what is in His will and not do that which is not - and this takes prayer!

Second, to humble ourselves under His hand, we must be in His word.  Here we will find everything we need to fill ourselves with a greater understanding of His will and His ways.  This is critical!  We must fill our minds with His truth - NOT just the usual happy verses but with the whole of His word.  We need to read the prophets to see any wayward way in ourselves.  We need to read the first five books to see His hand in the lives of real people who really suffered.  We need to read the Psalms and poetry to have our minds and hearts schooled in prayer and filled with hope.  We need to be reading the Gospels where we see God in the midst of real people as a real man.  We need the Epistles so that we understand, appreciate and live out the faith that saves us.

Third, to humble ourselve s we need the Body of Christ.  Yeah, I know, the first thing we think about is being embarrassed, being a burden, being a pain, being, "That guy."  But it is through the Body of Christ that God works in the lives of His people and so we must partake of God's provision.  All too often when we are suffering we want to lie and act as if everything was OK when it is anything but.  When we do this we lie - it's just that simple.  And that lie will crush us and keep us from God's providence through His Body.

Humility and humiliation - the first is a mercy the second a sin.  The first is of God, the second is of the world, the flesh and the devil.  The first will help you the second will harm you.  The first is life the second is death.  Finally the first will relieve the second.

Just a little while ago I was talking ith a guy I know from Caribou and we were sharing what ws going on in our lives.  I shared mine and Patti's situation and our concerns.  As we continued talking he said,  "Wait a minute."  Then he took $5 form his walllet and said, "The least I can do is buy you a cup of coffee."  Humiliating?  It should have been and almost was but God comforted my heart and I accepted the money.  Am I struggling with this even?  You bet I am.  It was embarassing and humiliating and --but it really was God's mercy and grace in a moment of time that I should cherish and take great comfort in - even if it is hard.

Humble yourself -- please.

Making the Most Prayer 02 032714

Making the Most
of the means of grace
02

2.  Private prayer

This is not just "private" prayer - it is penetrating prayer.  It is prayer that calls upon God to show us, not just Himself, but our selves as well.  It is prayer that cuts through all the "I want," "I need," "Please give," and gets down to the, "have mercy upon me a sinner."

Most of us know the acronym ACTS
Adoration
Confession
Thanksgiving
Supplication

Now there nothing wrong with this as a reminder of the components of prayer but I think if falls short of the whole of it.  There is no explicit "letter" for seeking God's exposure of our hearts.  It's easy to run through these parts of prayer without ever seeking God's exposure of our true and hidden spiritual needs - the nitty gritty.  There is no depth demanded and I suspect (for I find it true in me) that there is no depth sought.

Prayer is, fundamentlly, a conversation - a two way conversation.  Certainly we ought go to God with the common and even mundane requests that we are aware of but to do this and only this is perhaps a great waste of a great opportunity.

Most of our private prayers could be prayed in public with little alteration.  They are shallow and halt - usually.  Private prayer, as the Puritains saw it, was deep, gut wrenching, no-holds-barred, open your soul and heart and seek to expose the deepest of corruptions kind of prayers.  They were blood-sweating prayers.  They were prayers for holiness and righteousness of life - here now - for Him.

Oh, we may get close to that when we pray the "C" (confession) but God desires so much more of and for us and we must dig deeply into prayer to touch it.  David asked God to "test," or "try" his heart to see if there was any wicked way in him.  That's "any" wicked way not just the easily seen and comfortably remembered evil ways that we are at ease acknowledging.

I think sometimes that we are too comfortble in our redemption and justification.  We wear it more tike a windbeaker than a heavy coat.  What I mean is that we are more than willing to see our easy sins and rejoice in their forgiveness but we are rarey willing go dig deep into the cold and dark recesses of our souls to find what the Puritains called "heart sins" or the sins under the sins that are uder the sins.  We fail to ask to see the utter corruption for which Christ came and suffered.

Private prayer is the time when we need to be digging deep.  We need to be seeking God's exposure of just how badly we need Christ - just how very very much we need Him.  It's the place where we drop the "I'm not so bad," approach to our sin and cry out to see exactly how "bad" we really are.

PS
Are these posts of any benefit to you?  If they are or are not I would like to hear from you. Your input and/or encouragement would be a blessing and mercy.  You can comment on the blog page of, if you want, you can email me at sheepdog.ms@gmail.com.

Bless you for your help!
Michael

Broken Hearts and Bruised Souls 032514

Broken Hearts and Bruised Souls
032614

There are, in every congregation brothers and sisters who live with broken hearts and bruised souls.  They sit quietly, usually alone in the back, pray haltingly and have a look of deep yearning on their faces.

They long to have a sense of being a part of the body but they sense that their "difference" somehow excludes them.  They are alone in the crowd and being in the crowd makes their loneliness even greater.  They sit and even with a frozen smile on their faces they weep rivers of tear inside.

I'm writing about the melacholy (depressed), the Bi-polar, those who suffer anxiety disorders and the like.  They live in our world and go to our churches and yet they never have a sense of being a part of any of it.

Shame is a big part of their lives.  They can't run, do, work or even feel as other do and so they have a sense of being aliens and strangers in a way you can only imagine.

They look OK, they even socialize ok but the cost of doing either or both is great.  One hour in church and they are exhausted, they feel rode hard and put up wet.  They are drained and so their hearts and souls ache regardless of the joy and hope that is theirs.

Imagine waking up each morning with a sense that your life is not worth living.  Imagine waking up each morning terrified of what evil or difficulty might come your way.  Imagine feeling like every odd look is an accusation, a confirmation of your difference.  Imagine yearning for heaven more to escape your life than to be with the Lord.

These are broken hearts and bruised souls.  These are some of the bruised reeds and smoldering wicks Jesus promised to not break or snuff out.  But even that assurance does little to aleviate the pain and ache of being so very different and trying to fit in.

"Hi, my name is Fred and I want to die."  Think about having that thought several times a day.  Think about having to resist introducing yourself that way.  Think about having that feeling and not being able to tell anyne about it.  No, I don't mean they want to kill themselves, few do; but they live with a tension that tears at their hearts and souls every minute of every day.

No one understands except their counselor and even they are clueless apart from their objective clinical training.  Their pastor does not understand.  Their famiies do not understand.  Worst of all, they do not understand.

Imagine having a wonderful blessing happen to you.  You know it's a blessing.  You see God's hand in it and yet instead of lifting your heart and soul you find yourself fighting a downward spiral.  What would lift another up casts you down.

Imagine yearning for relief you know, short of a miracle, will not come.  Imagine happiness making you sad, joy terrifying you and kindness seeming like condecention - pity of the pathetic.

Imagine having to live your life in your head because if you let it our people will flee.  Imagine fighting every moment to just hang on and not give up.  Imagine just wanting to sit in a darkened room until life fades away.

These bruised reeds need to be able to be who they are and live in the open.  They need to be understood and their condition must be appreciated as real and terrible.  They dont need pampering but they need to be able to speak their pain to someone(s) other than the folks they have to pay to listen.

They desperately need to have others understand that for them, their condition is as normal as it gets.  Yes, they need sound biblical encouragement and admonishment and lots of other good and godly input.  But most of all they need to be accepted, embraced.

Being a part of the life of a bruised reed is tough, trying and costly.  Which is why so few of us are willing to be a part of their lives.  They can be demanding and depressing, frustrating if not infuriating but that's more a factor of our limitations than their condition.  It is more a part of our wanting to be comfortable and at our ease instead of involved in a messy ministry.

No, we are not all called to minister to these beautiful bruised reeds but we are all commanded to love them and they take a different kind of love.  None of us are exempt from loving them up close and personal.

Fear keeps us at a distance and fear causes them to withdraw.  Perfect love casts out fear - right or maybe?

The cost - 051113

Luk 14:28  "For which one of you, when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it?

"cost" = expense

How can we ever clearly count the cost of following the Master?  I don't know that it's possible to specifically enumerate the cost but in general He Himself makes it plain.

Paul puts it well:

Php 3:7  But whatever things were gain to me, those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ.

This is an interesting perspective that the English fails to convey clearly.  It's not just that Paul counts all that gave him place and status in the world as loss - but also that he counted it as damage/detriment with a view to violence.  It was violently damaging.

We put sooooo much confidence in our achievements here and in doing so we damamge ourselves - especially our walk.  If there is nothing we can do to be His we can't place confidence or take fleshly pride in our achievements.

It's the "not I but Christ" conundrum.   We did and do things that the world and the flesh applaud and encourage us to build our view of ourselves upon.  Education, training, talents, skills - all these things the world encourages the flesh to revel in and use to get ahead in the world with.  

But where are we told we are to, "get ahead" in the world - especially by the world's criteria?  Paul saw, in comparison to knowing Christ, all he had achieved (which was considerable) as damaging and detrimental.

Here is a nice insight into:

Rom 7:18-24  For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not.  (19)  For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want.  (20)  But if I am doing the very thing I do not want, I am no longer the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me.  (21)  I find then the principle that evil is present in me, the one who wants to do good.  (22)  For I joyfully concur with the law of God in the inner man,  (23)  but I see a different law in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin which is in my members.  (24)  Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death?

We're currently "downsizing" and I've found certificates and plaques and awards - all kinds of neat things that I could take pride in and use in the world to advance there.  But - is that where I really want to advance?  Do I want to fight my way downfield just to score a goal for the other team?  Do I want to run their plays - work their gameplan?  Even use their players?  I don;t think so.

Dieing to self is not some weird nebulous hippy dippy idea - it is a very real and necessary and intentional giving over all "we" have done, do and will do to His glory and honor.  all I have achieved in all of my life is His to glory in not mine.  It is His glory and - my sorrow (when it takes my eyes off Him and put them on me.)

D. Bonhoeffer said it well, "Christ calls men to come and to die."  Dead men achieve nothing.  But Christ makes us alive and lives in/through us so we may, in His power, in His divine mercy and grace "do" - whether it "achieves" ought or not is in His power to determine ( as well as "what" it does or does not achieve).  We can claim no credit, accept no applause, hear no accolades.  

We are dead men made alive again and that life is not our won (never really was).  We are not of the Kingdom of God and not of the world.  

Paul writes:

Php 4:12-13  I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.  (13)  I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

We soooo abuse verse 13.  Paul is calling us to "contentment."  The "all things" here are aimed at verse 11 and 12.  

Php 4:11  Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am.

Consider:

2Co 12:10  Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.

1Ti 6:8-10  If we have food and covering, with these we shall be content.  (9)  But those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a snare and many foolish and harmful desires which plunge men into ruin and destruction.  (10)  For the love of money is a root of all sorts of evil, and some by longing for it have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

Heb 13:5-6  Make sure that your character is free from the love of money, being content with what you have; for He Himself has said, "I WILL NEVER DESERT YOU, NOR WILL I EVER FORSAKE YOU,"  (6)  so that we confidently say, "THE LORD IS MY HELPER, I WILL NOT BE AFRAID. WHAT WILL MAN DO TO ME?"

The cost of our redemption was Him - the cost of our sanctification is "me."

Am I willing to meet that cost.

Luk 17:33  "Whoever seeks to keep his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life will preserve it.

Walking through Psalm 34

Psalm 34:1 ESV
I will bless the LORD at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth.

David wrote this after the Lord delivered him from one enemy while still being pursued by another.  It wasn't the end of his troubles and yet he accepted the blessing as the trial continued.

Verse 1
Though made at the time of his deliverance this is not a commitment new to David.  But he makes it here - again - a reaffirmation - a standing commitment a purpose.

This Psalm is not just for tough times.  But we tend to be drawn to it more so then than when we feel at ease and comfortable.  That's just us.  We take a lot for granted when we are not in distress - or at least I have learned I did.

But I have been convicted that this is a Psalm we should read daily - among others.  It presents us with evidence and assurance but it also admonishes us to draw close and stay close to Him.

This first verse is a tough one when we are despairing and yet even so we have cause to bless and praise Him.  Even though it might be a really fight - we need to do it - it is the foundation upon which all our prayers are built.  The best of starting places.

Consider its similarity to, "hallowed be Thy name.". There is no difference.  Jesus teaches us that.

Yes, it may be hard to do and it may taste like ashes in one's mouth but it is true that regardless of where we are or how we are He is oh so worthy of our praise.

Father,
When I am unable - or struggling - please - please put Your praises in my mind and heart and on my lips.  Make me able Lord to reach up out of my struggle and pain to bless  and praise You.
Make me see You worthiness and sense Your pleasure.  Do not let my raging turmoil silence my praise.  Do not let my suffering silence my blessing of You.
Help Thou my little faith and in my pain let me praise You for You are worthy to be praised - always - in everything.
Amen

Intimate insights 001

BE ANGRY, AND yet DO NOT SIN; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity.   (Eph 4:26-27)

The word translated "angry" carries the idea of being provoked - perhaps to wrath - perhaps not.

I've come to see that anger, usually, is a secondary emotion.  What I mean is that we are first afflicted with pain or fear and we respond with anger.  It makes sense.  When we are hurt or afraid we want to defend ourselves - so we are provoked.

Being provoked and it being common to become defensive (even offensively so) we will, unfortunately sin.  How do I know that?  Because the second word translated "anger" does carry the idea of, "the kind of severe or violent anger which arises from direct provocation, an aroused anger or seething exasperation." CWSB

We need to deal with the provocation - pain or fear as pain or fear.  Becoming bitter, though easily done, is not a option or response we want to allow to happen.

So we need to deal with that provocation (pain/fear) honestly and openly.  We need to bring it before the Lord for His providence, guidance, mercy and help.

I am learning - painfully :-}  that the devil will grab anything he can to encourage us not just to overt sin but to ignore the wonderful promises and providence of our God.  Nothing can please the devil more than for us to take matters into our own weak ande wayward hands.

That's what I'm learning.  The devil will use anything he can to lead us even a little way from our path.  He will use the fear of failure and the pain of loss and humiliation to get us to take hold of the reins and fight a fight we should never attempt to fight alone.

I am learning this - a dear brother prayed for me the other night and his prayer uncovered my pain and fear and the way the devil was using it to distract and render me weaker than I already was.  What a blessing when God brings His mercy though another - gently and in love.

We, Pat and I, have a hard road (at least it seems thus) and it is easy to be provoked and sin.  We pray often for His protection from the wiles of the devil and the baggage we've not yet surrendered.  We encourage you all to examine yourselves and see if you too are being provoked and let aside from the Way and His mercy and providence.

Father,
I fear too much from this world and hurt too much from things I haven't laid at Your feet.  Release me from those ties I still hold on to and protect me from the wiles and schemes of the evil one.  Help me (us) to trust You more and to come to You even obsessively for Your care and nurture especially in our fear and pain.

Amen

Psalm 7:17 Even when it hurts.

Psalm 7:17 ESV
I will give to the LORD the thanks due to his righteousness, and I will sing praise to the name of the LORD, the Most High.

I will!  But that's not always an easy thing.  Our flesh is weak and we struggle with fear and doubt for many reasons.  Some reasons are common others are rare and toxic.

When things are hard and we are anxious we need help in giving thanks and singing praise.    That's our struggle and it's not uncommon.

Let me encourage you to read the Psalms and search out those wherein David struggles as we do.  Pray those if you can't pray your own.

Let me encourage you (and myself) with the words of Richard Baxter - we should,
"Do it as we can in order to learn to do it better."

Little by little, step by step, agonizing prayer by agonizing prayer let us seek His power and mercy to give thanks and sing praise.  

Even as we weep upon our beds until we fall exhausted into sleep - let us thank and praise Him for His goodness and faithfulness and that He has made us His and keeps us so.

Father - I want to cry out in my distress.  It hinders my thankfulness and praise.  Help me Father, help me to reach above my need and anxiety to do thank you and praise you even when it feel shallow and forced.  Father, enable me to do it little by little and better and better for You are indeed worthy of my thanks and prayer.

Amen

He cares for us - let us let Him.

Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall. It is better to be of a lowly spirit with the poor than to divide the spoil with the proud. Whoever gives thought to the word will discover good, and blessed is he who trusts in the LORD.   (Pro 16:18-20)

Ok, I'm going to meddle - and expose!

Pride does indeed go before destruction.  But I've discovered two things.  First, "destruction" may come so that pride is exposed.  Pride must be exposed so we may repent of it.

Second, even in the "destruction" pride will fight tooth and nail.

We live in a culture of pride.  Pride of ownership, pride of place, pride of success.  We are encouraged to "have our pride" and to protect it regardless of the cost.  We are taught that humiliation and being humble are the same and both are bad.  

We recently received a couple of gifts to help us meet our obligations.  I can only describe me initial feeling as wonderful humiliation.  No sooner was I rejoicing at the kindness and generosity of my brothers and sisters in Christ than I was overcome with a deep and painful sense of shame and humiliation.

Pride makes us suffer, when we suffer, in isolation.  We are convinced that we need to "put a good face," on everything.  It's the old, "never let them see you sweat," admonition that sold tons of antiperspirant.  Huh?

Sweating is a normal and healthy bodily function.  We, however, have become convinced that it is not acceptable.  But, not sweating can be dangerous.

Suffering, difficult times, are normal for believers but we have become convinced that any suffering is a sign that we are somehow under God's wrath.  This is the cruelest deception our enemy perpetrates on us.  In Christ we have only God's discipline, never -- NEVER - His wrath.

Yet we react to suffering as though we should be ashamed.  Others react to our suffering as though we should be shunned.  This should not be - but it is - and we must work depending on Him to overcome it.

I am asking myself:   How do I face these people now that my need is known?  How can I hold my head up, look them in the eye?  What are they really thinking when they look at me?  What are they really saying when our situation comes up in conversation?

See the worm of pride in that?  See the self-focus?  See the suspicion of God's provision through His people?  Seer how the worm of pride eats away at the mercies and grace of God in our hearts?  See how pride is the great spoiler of blessings?

When God disciplines us with a "destruction" He does so because He loves us and He wants better for and of us than has been the case.  He wants us to depend upon Him more than we have.  This is a good thing even though it can be a painful thing.

In his sermon, 

109	February 29, 2012: Casting All Your Cares Alistair Begg | Messages from Truth For Life Truth For Life

Alistair addresses this issue.  I listen to this sermon every night as I go to bed.  I am working though the prideful anxiety he speaks about.  It's not easy and it is certainly not pleasant but I know it must be done.

Living in each 60 seconds casting my cares upon Him is tough.  I have learning and am still learning that it is not something I can do on my own.  I am also learning that I am not expected to do it on my own.  It is quite the opposite, I am to seek His provision, His power, to do it.  I won't do it on my own - not can I.

I want to encourage all of you who understand what I am writing about to accept not only His merciful discipline but also His gracious offer of care, comfort and provision.  


Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.  (1Pe 5:6-7)

This is the passage that Alistair preaches from.  Humbling and casting go together and we may have confidence in doing so because He cares for us.  

Father, let my focus on "I" be from my need for You and not because of my need.  You tell me to humble myself and to cast my anxiety on You.  I want to and I know that I must have Your provision to do so.  Please Father, keep this promise before my eyes and in my heart.  

Father, protect me from those pin-points of pride that steal my joy and confidence in you.  Make me understand that becoming humble is a good thing and what You are doing in our lives is a blessing and a mercy and that if flows from Your love and grace.

Father make it possible for me to know Your kindness and care and to accept You provision with a humble and contrite heart.  My anxiety does not come from You and I ask that You silence and still it.  Lord, take the sinful pride from my heart and make me move forward in Your love and grace and service.

Amen.