Reproaches have broken my heart, so that I am in despair. I looked for pity, but there was none, and for comforters, but I found none.
Been their? Done that?
I read this and my heart was pierced. I felt the weight of loneliness and abandonment. It was so very painful.
But as I considered the passage I realized that my feeling wan't fact because I indeed knew that we were pitied (not negatively) and that we has many comforters. BUT - I did have to look.
It wasn't pity and comforters I have to look at but rather my sense of having none. I had to confess that my sense of abandonment - of loneliness - of despair we due more to my expectations than any lack of these things. I had to confess that my "feeling" was due to not seeing any hero on the horizon - not hearing the bugle call of the cavalry coming to the rescue. I despaired because of my expectations.
It is not uncommon or necessarily wrong to look to people for help as God does use His people to comfort and care for one another. But I learned that we have to look to Him and not cast about for His means - especially those means we think He should use. We have to keep our desires, our godly longings and needs focused on Him first, foremost and always.
I also realized that our burdens - just by their existence - were burdens to others. There are others who hurt and ache for us. They call out o God for us. They call out to God for more than we know - for us. Family, friends, other believers - even other believers we don't know or know vaguely.
I was doing business with someone I sometimes use for computer fixes. I was in a particularly sensitive place in heart and mind. I guess it showed because shortly after leaving their place of business I got an email from them. They told me they noticed I was troubled and asked me what was wrong. I was overwhelmed with surprise and gratitude.
Here was another believer I didn't know well who was sensitive to my need just through my countenance (and probably the Spirit ;-}). They not only noticed but were willing to take action by inquiring and asking and lifting us up in prayer. God's hand was in this, I have no doubt.
What's the point here? I was looking to friends, family, business associated (all believers) and God threw me a curve ball. He sent someone outside my circle who noticed, asked, pitied (in a good way) and offered comfort. I was amazed and grateful but it took a while for me to see the depth and breadth of this blessing. I am reminded of:
I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth. (Psa 121:1-2)
We typically look to "the hills" for help when we should be looking to the Lord. This is common because the flesh is still active and it's a nasty habit. We look everywhere thinking we are looking to Him when we really aren't. We try to "figure out" how He is going to answer our prayers and we do this figuring in the flesh. We think of people, circumstances, fate, coincidence, all kinds of things that He may use - but we fool ourselves that in doing this we are looking to Him.
Like God's people all throughout history we begin to seek provision through or from someone or something other than God. Time and time again we see believers being enticed away from God to sources that offer no hope. It is, unfortunately, a common thing but a bad thing.
Our "hope," our "trust," is only in Him.
I wait for the LORD, my soul doth wait, and in his word do I hope. (Psa 130:5)
Father, may Your Name be glorified by my trust in You. Forgive my casting about, forgive my seeking in the flesh. I believe Father - help me in my unbelief. As a little child I come to You for comfort and correction and like a good Father You have always taken care for me.
Don't let me forget all the past and even the present mercies Oh Lord. Help my mind and heart be focused on Your faithfulness and Your glory.
You alone know my true needs and only Your provision can satisfy. Calm my heart and still the voice of the deceiver - give me good strength and courage to wait upon You and the rejoice that it is You I wait upon. For You can never be unfaithful to Your Word and promise.
Comfort and strengthen us. Let us see Your hand and sense Your love for we are afflicted and we are weak.
Amen
I read this and my heart was pierced. I felt the weight of loneliness and abandonment. It was so very painful.
But as I considered the passage I realized that my feeling wan't fact because I indeed knew that we were pitied (not negatively) and that we has many comforters. BUT - I did have to look.
It wasn't pity and comforters I have to look at but rather my sense of having none. I had to confess that my sense of abandonment - of loneliness - of despair we due more to my expectations than any lack of these things. I had to confess that my "feeling" was due to not seeing any hero on the horizon - not hearing the bugle call of the cavalry coming to the rescue. I despaired because of my expectations.
It is not uncommon or necessarily wrong to look to people for help as God does use His people to comfort and care for one another. But I learned that we have to look to Him and not cast about for His means - especially those means we think He should use. We have to keep our desires, our godly longings and needs focused on Him first, foremost and always.
I also realized that our burdens - just by their existence - were burdens to others. There are others who hurt and ache for us. They call out o God for us. They call out to God for more than we know - for us. Family, friends, other believers - even other believers we don't know or know vaguely.
I was doing business with someone I sometimes use for computer fixes. I was in a particularly sensitive place in heart and mind. I guess it showed because shortly after leaving their place of business I got an email from them. They told me they noticed I was troubled and asked me what was wrong. I was overwhelmed with surprise and gratitude.
Here was another believer I didn't know well who was sensitive to my need just through my countenance (and probably the Spirit ;-}). They not only noticed but were willing to take action by inquiring and asking and lifting us up in prayer. God's hand was in this, I have no doubt.
What's the point here? I was looking to friends, family, business associated (all believers) and God threw me a curve ball. He sent someone outside my circle who noticed, asked, pitied (in a good way) and offered comfort. I was amazed and grateful but it took a while for me to see the depth and breadth of this blessing. I am reminded of:
I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth. (Psa 121:1-2)
We typically look to "the hills" for help when we should be looking to the Lord. This is common because the flesh is still active and it's a nasty habit. We look everywhere thinking we are looking to Him when we really aren't. We try to "figure out" how He is going to answer our prayers and we do this figuring in the flesh. We think of people, circumstances, fate, coincidence, all kinds of things that He may use - but we fool ourselves that in doing this we are looking to Him.
Like God's people all throughout history we begin to seek provision through or from someone or something other than God. Time and time again we see believers being enticed away from God to sources that offer no hope. It is, unfortunately, a common thing but a bad thing.
Our "hope," our "trust," is only in Him.
I wait for the LORD, my soul doth wait, and in his word do I hope. (Psa 130:5)
Father, may Your Name be glorified by my trust in You. Forgive my casting about, forgive my seeking in the flesh. I believe Father - help me in my unbelief. As a little child I come to You for comfort and correction and like a good Father You have always taken care for me.
Don't let me forget all the past and even the present mercies Oh Lord. Help my mind and heart be focused on Your faithfulness and Your glory.
You alone know my true needs and only Your provision can satisfy. Calm my heart and still the voice of the deceiver - give me good strength and courage to wait upon You and the rejoice that it is You I wait upon. For You can never be unfaithful to Your Word and promise.
Comfort and strengthen us. Let us see Your hand and sense Your love for we are afflicted and we are weak.
Amen
Praying for you and Patti....you are not alone.
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